May 26, 2016
A young photo showed uuup >_<
This is from 20 years ago (lol)
My head is orange, so it's from my first trip to Los Angeles
I was so thiiiin~
And my skin was so smooth~
Youth is an asset, isn't it?
Since I'm happy now,
I'm not thinking that I want to go back in time or anything, but
I do hate the way that my head feels like it's just constantly being filled with more and more stress
Still, time won't wait for you
One time, in those days,
I suddenly decided that I wanted to commit suicide.
I ran and jumped from the rooftop of a 10-storey building.
I fell on top of a car.
I got away with a sprained leg and whiplash in my neck.
Aside from feeling like I was crippled when I went home, it was almost like nothing happened.
I went home laughing.
I was laughing the whole time.
(**line I don't get**)
I really just don't die.
My heart stopped from bad doping three times.
I fell from a building twice.
My car rolled over once.
I got swept away by a typhoon wave once.
A gun was held to my head once in America.
I fell off my motorcycle going 160 kilos once and slammed into some trees by a dry river bed.
I was stabbed* in Harajuku twice, and I was saved because I had an iron plate in my leather jacket (lol)
I had a cardiac arrest while I was getting a contrast study of my coronary artery once.
And I had two surgeries to remove my intestines with a pretty low survival rate.
I wonder if I have a death wish?
Too bad. (lol)
I don't know if God has a plan for me, or if he's keeping me alive, but
Well, somehow, I think so**
I won't forget to be grateful.
Maybe he's not doing anything (lol)***
I don't know, but
Now, I'm really happy.
Even if I'm laughing a bit bitterly now.****
*,**, ***, **** I'm really not sure about these lines
February 1, 2016
Third Day in the Hospital
Sorry for making you guys worry.
Seems like they haven't decided if I need surgery.
There's a 140 cm tube coming out of my nose, and it goes all the way to my insides.
It's sucking out stuff from inside, but the part that's hanging from my nose down my throat is annoying. I'm in a lot of pain, so at first I was getting painkillers in my IV, but they didn't agree with me. My laboured breathing and sweating got really bad, so they stopped the painkillers quick. It took a while to recover from that. Now I just have a headache and nausea. But I'll keep trying my best.
Today is THE SOUND BEE HD's live in Osaka.
I'm truly sorry that I can't go.
It's so frustrating. I apologize.
I can't stand on the stage, but my band members are gonna do the show and they're not going to lose to the other bands.
I'm really just grateful for that.
I'm going to keep doing my best to get out of here soon.
November 23, 2015
I got some power from OZZY to fire up my deteriorating body.
November 20, 2015
I bit my tongue!
I was worried about getting another intestinal obstruction, so I was chewing my food really carefully, and then I heard a crunching noise.
It's a blood-flavoured salad. (lol)
November 19, 2015
Went and Came Back
I was bleeding from my rectum, so I went to the hospital.
Thankfully it wasn't anything severe.
I'm going to keep fighting as hard as I can so we can do this one-man properly.
I'm just praying everything work out.
November 15, 2015
Release date set!
I can leave the hospital today!
The schedule to recover from this intestinal obstruction took about two weeks.
Starting with nothing to eat or drink, then gradually moving back up to solid food.
It's a good thing I got better quickly.
But the scary thing is that this might keep happening again and again if I'm not careful.
Well, time to get ready to make my escape.
November 14, 2015
I love rice, but this kind of thing is the easiest way to get another blockage.
If I don't chew my food until my jaw hurts, I might end up back at the starting point again and end up prolonging my hospital stay.
Chewing carefully, carefully...
August 9, 2015
Make me stop crying
Thank you everyone.
Kakeru, Roqusama Carta, and of course THE SOUND BEE HD's guitarist Yuu.*
Somehow, it seems like all I'm doing is crying
It hurts so I'm crying
I'm scared so I"m crying
I'm pitiful so I'm crying
I'm saved so I'm crying
I'm being cared for so I'm crying
And my labelmates and other bands at the event are cheering me on so I'm crying
When I read messages from my band members who've put up with all this, I start crying
I'm just crying all the time
Now, the progress of the illness has stopped
So next up will be fighting any complications from the surgery and preventing infections
Then rehabilitation, and trying to hold onto my physical disability certificate
From now on, I'm going to be fighting for the rest of my life
But I won't lose.
I won't give up.
Because even if it's a small chance, it's possible.
Because you guys are there.
One day, I'm going to take my voice back
So until the day I can return,.
Wait for me everyone, okay?
This shinigami will keep fighting now as well
I loooooooooove you guys, and my band members
*This was posted after the Starwave Records session event Daisuke was supposed to be a part of. Because he wasn't able to perform, Kakeru (Scarlet Valse), Kagerou (Syokudaikakkokai), Iori (Magistina Saga) and Rui (Misaruka) filled in for him during his session. He mentions these three names in particular because they posted pictures on Twitter to cheer him up. The image attached to this entry shows pics Kakeru and Roqusama Carta took of messages they wrote on their face and hands to show their support for Daisuke during the concert.
Aug. 8, 2015
No good, no good, no good!
What is this?!
I weigh 43kg! (◎_◎;)
At first, I was a 157cm, 60kg gorilla-macho
I looked like a beaten up old wrestler,
So I decided that I had to lose weight,
And I managed to squeeze down to 55kg around June.
I was planning to keep pushing myself with dieting and exercise until around 50kg.
This is ridiculous.
I can't run at 43kg.
Feed me ice cream and choooooocolate
What's going on, am I going to die?*
When I was at my absolute fattest, the worst snacking I did was ...**
That's bad, isn't it?
Well, I need something like chocolate potato chips to fatten back up
Even though I've lost weight,
I have more wrinkles now, and my strength is gone.
I need to gain a little weight, so the wrinkles will go away and I'll look young again
Even though I'm 45, a police officer seriously interrogated me recently because he thought my license was forged. But now I look about 80, don't I? (lol)
Well, whatever, it's fine for a shinigami.
Not being onstage is the only thing that's really getting to me
Even if I have to do it with a cane, I'm going to shout, headbang and jump around (lol)
But the main thing is singing
Since it might sound different***
I'm a shinigami! Today as well, I'm living!
No one here is crying, right?
Today as well, your pain and the pain from the complications from my illness, let's take them away!
I'll keep fighting
Today as well, I love you guys.
Don't give in to the heat!
*I don't really know how to read this. He's joking around, as far as I can tell?
**I have no idea what the rest of this part says. I think he's just talking about his bad eating habits.
***I'm not sure about this
Aug. 5, 2015
Kiwamu-shachou* came to visit!
It's really dangerous right now, so I wasn't allowed to have visitors,
But Kiwamu-shachou is an exception.
I wanted to talk to him.
First of all, he gave me this.
Starwave Omnibus vol. 4!
I was really happy.
For five years, we've been working together.
I went from being limited to being part of a company.
When I was getting nowhere with my band and living in obscurity,
He gave me a ray of light.
He's the man who gave my life a purpose again.
I think his name shows that we were destined to meet too.
Without him, the life I'm living wouldn't have been possible.
And, since I believe that there aren't very many people around here right now with his foresight, strategic approach and attention to detail, I immediately wanted to join up with him.
I have some foresight too, and I believed in him.
All of this has been heading towards the world we've imagined.
I can't forget the time I was with Extacy Records.
I'm happy I was able to stand on the same stage as both LUNA SEA and X JAPAN.
hide-san was also there. Toshi-san ...**
I felt like it gave my existence a purpose****
The after parties got messsssy (lol)
So, I want to be part of a label like that again and help form a scene
I want to help raise young stars and create a new festival in Japan
I believe that Kiwamu-shachou is indispensable for that
I believe that he is the type of person who can do it,
So I'm following him wholeheartedly
We've joined forces, and I'll keep going with my activities as an artist
Now, two Starwave artists are playing one-man lives at Shinjuku ReNY.
And, bands signed to the label have grown to the point that they can play one-mans.
Since everyone is truly doing their best and doing things like passing out flyers,*****
It doesn't seem impossible******
Positive things are happening*******
I don't know if it's happening slow or fast, but the label is growing steadily
My prediction was right.
I've been confined to a bed by illness, but my labelmates, my band members and Kiwamu-shachou have all given me rays of light.
That's why I'm definitely going to get better.
I want to make a comeback.
I want to see everyone.
All of this light surrounding me.
I love you.
I'm not going to lose.
Until the end, until the very end.
I won't give up.
Thank you, Kiwamu-shachou
I'm definitely coming back.
Let's make our dreams come true!
*"company president". Kiwamu owns the label THE SOUND BEE HD are on.
**Kiwamu's name translates to something like "The result of study"? I'm not really sure how to read it at all, but the idea here is that it's something that made Daisuke think that they were destined to meet at that point in his life.
***I'm not sure about the part about Toshi at all
****, *****, ******, *******Not sure about these at all either
Jan 29, 2015
Check this out!
It looks like someone uploaded this picture to Twitter?
I absolutely don't want to go back to the past or anything, but I do want to go back to being thinner.
I wonder if the only way I can do that is by going to something like RIZAP?*
This picture is from around 20 years ago.
I must have been 22? Maybe 23?
Time sure passes by fast, doesn't it?
This brought back some memories.
It was fun to think about them.
NoriMAMA**, thank you.
*This seems to be some sort of gym or personal trainer service that promises drastic makeovers (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TynF2dPKLNw)
**NoriMAMA is the username of the person who uploaded it on Twitter
And this too!
And in those jeans!
My cheeks were hollow.
At that time, my waist was probably not even as big as my head.
It was like 24 inches.
Around 52 cm. >_<
My weight was like 39 kilos too.
If I went back to that weight now, I'd definitely die.
Dec. 5, 2014
I went to see LIV'ERT's one-man at Ikebukuro EDGE.
It inspired me to keep trying hard.
The person who made and designed our costumes is the same, Mira-san* ^-^
Since the quality of her work is really high, I think she's such an artist.
As a designer, she's always more than faithful to the decadent world I want to create.
LIV'ERT's costumes are cool too.
I wonder if she'll make costumes for me again next year.
*I'm assuming Mira-san is a woman, but this entry doesn't really specify
Nov. 1, 2014
I’m really happy
Sept. 12, 2014
I wonder if it's because the blood vessels in my heart have gotten thinner.
It hurt when I was going to bed last night,
And I was tired, but I couldn't get much sleep.
Well, if I can get through today,
I'll be able to go completely into music mode.
We're steadily getting towards the finish.
I've been inspired by Yuu*, and I'm going to make some more changes to the songs.
I'm excited to see what will happen before the album gets to you all.**
Wait for it.
*New support member, guitarist of lix and Suicide Ali, who is helping him produce the new album
**I'm not too sure about this line.
Sept. 2, 2014
It's a picture of me when I was a kid ^-^
The stroller has a really Showa era feel to it.
My arms and legs were short then, and that hasn't really changed much now
This guy is going to become a shinigami (lol)
Aug. 30, 2014
Even though I know it's no good, my heart is pounding.
I auditioned on the 25th,
And today my rivals are auditioning.
For that heavy metal band that's on the top level even on the world stage.
I've been restless since morning,
So, I'm getting up.